Our journey with our oldest son was definitely not at all what we expected it to be. Aleks was born three years after my wife and I got married. His birth and first four months of his life were pretty typical. He was growing as expected and hitting his milestones as expected. Then the unexpected happened. After my wife went back to work, a friend of ours was watching Aleks until we found a more permanent solution. My wife worked in the same neighborhood as the babysitter and she happened to stop by one day during her lunch break. She knew something was up with Aleks. He was very sleepy and was not displaying his typical personality. Her momma bear instincts kicked in and she took Aleks to his pediatrician. The pediatrician immediately sent my wife and Aleks to the hospital.

What happened next shook my wife and I to our core. The doctors in the emergency room said that Aleks had Shaken Baby Syndrome and someone had been abusing our baby. This was completely shocking on so many levels. Aleks was hitting all of his milestones and never had a scratch on him. He was always around family and friends and we did not think anyone would do anything to harm Aleks. Since we had no explanation for the cause of Aleks’ injuries the hospital called DHS and the police. A couple of days into Aleks’ hospital stay, the babysitter called us to say that Aleks was dropped after he was finished eating. That helped us out with DHS and the police but we were not out of the woods with Aleks. He had bleeding on his brain, a concussion, brain damage and bleeding behind both eyes. He was in the hospital for eight days before he was finally discharged. The doctors told us he was going to need a shunt to relieve the pressure on his brain from the bleeding.

A month after we got home, Aleks had a really rough night’s sleep. He was cranky and up and down all night. We called his doctor and decided he needed the shunt right away. We spent another week in the hospital with Aleks while he recovered from surgery. After surgery my wife and I quickly learned how to advocate for Aleks’ needs. We were thrown right into the fire and I don’t think we had time to truly process what we were all going through. My wife was a rock start handling all of Aleks’ follow up appointments with his team of doctors and therapists. We also began OT and PT services in our home. I handled DHS, the police and the district attorney’s office. Aleks made a miraculous recovery and over time was cleared by every specialist that was following him.

When Aleks was three years old we decided to enroll him in a local daycare. We figured that he was now ready to get around some kids his own age and make some friends. All the therapy and appointments were finally behind us, or so we thought. Almost immediately Aleks had trouble. He was aggressive with his teachers, couldn’t follow the daily schedule and would almost constantly try to run out of the room. At the same time at home we noticed he was being more aggressive with us and eloping whenever we took him out of the house. Thankfully the owner of the daycare was so nice and helpful. She pointed us in the right direction to get him evaluated and to get him whatever help he needed.